my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
my sisters under your porch take her home
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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