P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
What drink are we having for lunch?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
