I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize