If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize