i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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