You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
did i just pee glitter
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
