Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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