So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
