I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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