I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
