Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
