I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
