Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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