we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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