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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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