His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
