We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
