you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
