She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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