47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
So vagazzling was a success
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
