I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
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