She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I think I have vodka in my lungs
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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