this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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