Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
