yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
