Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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