You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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