Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
