no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I think i got beer on your cat.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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