He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize