Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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