Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
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