I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
