Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
