I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
