The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
