fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
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