glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Randomize