what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
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