I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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