Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize