Tell her she can't have a vagina
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
