How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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