I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize