answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
