just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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