Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
