Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Boobs are out for the taking
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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