somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
