Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
