Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.

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(909): View more from California

Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day

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(270): View more from Kentucky

it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.

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(614): View more from Ohio

This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..

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(214): View more from Texas

I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!

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(615): View more from Tennessee

I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.

(1-615): View more from Tennessee

Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?

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(209): View more from California

You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures

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(254): View more from Texas

Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?

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