i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
